So often people come up and thank me for all that I have done yet I then get questions about why do I do what I do. It does not really make a lot of sense to me so today's blog (rant) is going to be a bit off the normal what's up and more about the why.
Every person has to have a place where they can feel comfortable, for me that place is inside my heart. I have had to do things in my life that I am not all that happy with on reflection but have come to grips with the fact that they needed to be done. Getting right with oneself is probably one of the hardest things we all have to do in our lives or at least it is for me. Yes I use the present tense because it is a daily task not something that is done once and finished. So how do I go about this process for me? One word, Forgiveness, that's right simple little thing and I am not talking about saying I am sorry. I am not talking about asking for forgiveness either. Yes there is a piece of that in there but the reality is that forgiveness is an inside job. “Forgiveness is not an occasional act, it is a constant attitude.” ― Martin Luther King Jr.
Now that the brick of my wall has been made let's start to build the foundation of my life. Back in the first paragraph I mentioned my wonderment or conundrum with all the thanks for what I have done with little understanding of why I do what I do. That "Constant Attitude" of forgiveness requires an action not just an "Attitude" or so I have learned through my life's experiences. Nothing I have ever done without action has ever had any lasting meaning in my life, everything required action not just a thank you or an I'm sorry but a change in my behavior and attitude. 
So when I was retired from the Army due to medical issues I failed to see it as a blessing and a second chance, what I saw was a slap in the face and a dismissal without a real chance to prove I could actually continue on as a soldier. I set out to prove I could be successful in the civilian community with all the vigor of a soldier and very little understanding of the gift of life I was actually given. In time I was slapped again with more complications that did put me on my knees and caused me to almost take my life. I point this out not for the fact that I was so depressed because of what was going on but to point out how selfish I had become. I had been given two amazing children and a wife that even though I was so self consumed in my own world stood beside me yet I wanted out, to take a forever solution to a problem that only required me to ask for my own forgiveness and forgive others. The act of forgiveness is the key to the change the way I live my life today. I do what I do today because I was given a future not a past that is bright. My hand and my mind have to reach out to others that have to travel the same roads I have traveled not to make their road easier but to allow them to understand there is light at the end of the tunnel and it is not a train or a truck barreling down on them. The hope that comes from forgiveness comes from within not from others. What comes from others in the end is the understanding that the only way to continue forward is to do what you can everyday. Never quit as Winston Churchill said once as his speech for a graduation once, then when asked to ad more he said ok Never, Never Quit.
Sometimes I like to over complicate and have to remind myself that the real trick is to over simplify and enjoy the outcome. No one has all the answers but when we stop and enjoy the sunsets and all that life has to offer.
Now for the house keeping. The month of September has been a mellow month for travels for me. More just medical stuff with a few unplanned issues that came up. Nothing to get to worried about that is for sure, just took some time to slow down and let my body relax a little. The month of October is going to be a busy month for sure with a few holidays and memorials happening. For those that were in during the Beirut timeframe that is going to be remembered right here in the quiet corner again this year. Please take a moment to say a prayer for those that were taken from us that day on Oct 23.
